So, if you haven’t already figured out by my post’s title, today is my birthday! I have officially turned 22 years old! Now, I know a lot of people hate aging, they hate the thought of getting one year older—but I, on the other hand, LOVE saying I’m getting older. From such an early age, I’ve always lived with the mentality “when I’m older I can do this.” When I was in elementary, I was already looking forward to graduating high school and having a car (the latter sadly did not happen till a year ago thanks to procrastination, haha). In high school, I was already looking forward to graduating university and moving out. And my whole life, I’ve always been looking forward to falling in love, having a job, getting married and starting a family. And now that I’ve graduated high school, will be graduating university this semester, have a home of my own and will be looking for a job afterwards…it seems my time for getting married and having a family is next! Haha, poor Filip. I’ve had our entire life planned before I even knew him, and he doesn’t even know it.
But since I know that whole getting married and having a family thing won’t be happening for some time, I should be thankful for all I’ve learned these past 22 years and pay homage to the events and people in my life that have made the past year incredible.
- I’ve learned that even though a life ends, the heart of a family stays the same. I’ll always miss Nanaji (means “grandpa” in Punjabi) but it’s slowly getting easier to let him go.
- I’ve learned that no matter how strong I think I am, there will always be moments when I just need to release those emotions. And that it’s okay.
- I’ve learned that, at the end of the day, my family will always have my back. Even when those friends who said they’d be there for me forever walked out, made mistakes or put themselves first, my family is always there to pick up the pieces.
- I’ve learned there will never be that “perfect” time. My whole life I’ve aspired for doing things at a certain time because then it’d be the perfect time. For example, I wouldn’t buy a pair of jeans because I was always saying I’d lose those last five pounds first (spoiler: never happened). And I would have this perfect image of my life in my head, always saying I won’t do this until such-and-such happens. But guess what? Life always mixes things up and sometimes that “perfect” time never comes. It’s taken me 22 years to figure this out, and years of my aunt’s rantings, but I think I’ve finally understood. Sorry I’m such a slow learner.
- I’ve learned that I’m average. I will always just be an average student, that no amount of studying is ever going to make me a star pupil because my test-anxiety, shyness, and average brain will never get me that 3.8 GPA. But that’s okay. Not everyone is meant to be spectacular at everything.
- I’ve learned that I can be needy. I yearn for constant interaction with my friends or Fil, and it’s getting harder and harder for me to be alone. I need to work on this.
- I’ve learned that I need to be happy with what I have. Like I said before, I’m always waiting for that “perfect” time, but this also extends to wanting those “perfect” group of friends, those “perfect” moments with Fil, all the “perfect” places I want to travel to NOW, and all the “perfect” jobs I want to try. I want that “perfect” life now and I need to remind myself that all come in due time. I need to stop being so impatient.
- And I’ve learned that although some things may seem scary at first, in the end they are totally worth it. Take this blog, for example. Before starting it, I was scared I wouldn’t be good enough, that no one would like me, and that I wouldn’t make any friends. However, the opposite happened! I’ve grown more self-confident in myself and my writing abilities; I’ve been able to gain new followers every week; and I’m met great people along the way. These past two years (particularly the past year) wouldn’t have been the same if it hadn’t been for such a wonderful book blogosphere. I love you all so much :)
Again, thanks to all that have made this past year wonderful, and I’m so looking forward to my 23rd birthday!